NOT YOUR MARY!

[rollerfan222]

Ok so according to Silent Haven in Tumblr Tomm Hulett wrote this, so if he did great job Tomm! It's Hilarious!, for some reason the video won't show up so if you want play an instrumental of "call me maybe" and read the lyrics below.
:

Born from a wish made in hell
Or Heaven I couldn’t tell
I think that guy’s daughter fell
And now I’m in your way.
I spared my life on a lark
Threw my gun into the dark
Went down to Rosewater Park
And now I’m in your way.
Your speech was broken
Toluca Lake, seams are showin’
Cold night, fog was blowin’
Where you think you’re going, baby?
Hey, I just met you, and this is scary,
My face and voice match; I’m not your Mary.
It’s hard to keep up, with you baby,
I might be coughing—I’m not your Mary.
Hey, I just met you, and this is scary,
I’m here for you, James. I’m not your Mary.
That red pyramid guy, tries to chase me,
I’m here for you, James. I’m not your Mary.
You took your time checking locks
Wasting away on a cot
I’m kind of sorry we fought, when you said ‘anyway’.
Locked behind bars made of steel
You touch me, see that I’m real
I’m no good running in heels, I’d just be in your way.
Your world is horror
Taut flesh, weeping sores
Jumping through the floor
Where the hell is Laura, baby?
Hey, I just met you, and this is scary,
I’m here for you, James. I’m not your Mary.
It’s hard to look right at me, baby?
My face and voice match; I’m not your Mary.
Hey, I just met you, and this is scary,
I’m here for you, James. I’m not your Mary.
It’s hard to stay alive, near you baby,
I’m here for you, James. So please don’t kill me.
Before I was brought back to life I missed you so bad.
I missed you so bad… I missed you so, so bad.
Before I was brought back to life I missed you so bad.
And you should know that… I missed you so, so bad.
It’s hard to look right at me, baby?
Did something happen? I’m not your Mary.
Hey, I just met you, and this is scary,
I’m here for you, James. I’m not your Mary.
These red pyramid guys, try to spear me,
But you don’t need them. So please don’t kill me.
Before I was brought back to life I missed you so bad.
I missed you so bad… I missed you so, so bad.
Before I was brought back to life I missed you so bad.
And you should know that
I’m not your Mary.

[Strawberry Thunder]

I think the guy who wrote that has too much time on his hands.

[slave2thewage]

As if I wasn't side-eyeing Hulett enough...

[AuraTwilight]

It doesn't seem like Hulett would write. Got a link to the source?

[Droo]

[fudgestix]

Well, its from his blog originally so I'm guessing totes srs?

[Droo]

[Jonipoon]

It would be funnier if it ended with "Im not your god damn Mary".

[Excision & Datsik]

Well, I don't get why other members are frowning on this, but I personally find this rather amusing. Although, some parts are kinda off.

[JuriDawn]

I am 100% in favor of geeky parodies of popular songs, and "Call Me Maybe" lends itself to that purpose beautifully for some reason.

(contains Dark Knight Rises spoilers)


Now if we could get Eileen Galvin to make a video performing Tomm's version in costume, even Drew would have to love it.

[Silent_Storm]

What's the full name of the original song I searched Call Me Maybe and about 200 songs came up?

[Squarehead]

^Why the hell would you want to find it after that?